Tuesday, April 26, 2005

My fantasies

My Inner Hero - Warrior!

I'm a Warrior!

I'm courageous, straightforward, and charismatic. I'm a born leader, but I'm also not afraid to face danger on my own. Nothing stands between me and victory... nothing that lives to tell the tale, anyway. If you need someone to charge into battle for you, call on me.

How about you? Click here to find your own inner hero.

When I was a small boy, my heroes were Tarzan and El Zorro. I had this recurring fantasy of me being the leader of a great legion of superheroes, aided by these two characters as my two loyal lieutenants. I had two uniforms, one consisting of a black cape and mask and one consisting of ......well.....my underwear. It never occurred to me that it would be kind of strange for hundreds of superheroes to choose a 4 year old as their leader. In this fantasy, women were naked by default. There was a group of "a hundred naked women", with nothing better to do than hang around a 4 year old dressed as Zorro. It wasn't a sexual thing. I just enjoyed being around naked women. In fact, I still do. Once in a while my sister and my mother would show up in my fantasy and they too would have to be naked, once again proving that Freud indeed, was a genius.
As I grew a little older I upgraded to Conan the Barbarian and James Bond. I ravenously devoured all of Ian Flemmings books. I had this little stint with Sherlock Holmes, but as much as I appreciated his investigative skills, I just couldn't picture him brandishing a heavy machinegun, or beheading multiple enemies in one stroke with his mighty two-handed sword. My fantasies changed like-wise. In my dreams, I started running around deserts and forests brandishing a hughe variety of swords and heavy caliber guns. Women were no longer naked, but mostly dressed in a tasteful Victoria's secret outfit. And all this I did immaculately dressed in my dinnerjacket or ..... well.... underwear.
Nowadays, my heroes are Carl Gustav Jung, Ali Sina and Theo van Gogh (a grimy Dutch filmmaker and columnist shot, stabbed and beheaded to death for criticizing islam.) But in my fantasies...... let's just say that women are still in danger of hypothermia. And for the guys out there: We know what we fantasize about. Things don't change much do they? Let's just keep it our little secret.


Blogger Le chameau insatiable said...

I'm a wizard : You were put on this earth to enlighten people. They will listen to you, because they are impressed by your vocabulary, your erudition, and your ability to grasp concepts that invariably elude them. You are the one who has to figure things out, because let's face it - you're the only one smart enough.
That is sooo me, oh yes i love tests like these...

3:21 PM  
Blogger Ariel said...


11:25 PM  
Blogger Sassy said...

Bulb...your MY hero =)

11:38 PM  
Blogger bulb said...

Goddammit!!!!! I want to be a fucking wizzard!
Pinky.... Everybody loves le chameau (Saving her for a dry spell in my love life right now) and sass....... ehm...... thanks.

2:51 AM  
Blogger kris said...

My Inner Hero - Rogue!

It's a good thing I use my powers for good and not evil, because quite frankly, I could get away with murder. I'm clever, tricky, and charming. I know how to make you laugh with one hand and pick your pocket with the other. Not that I'd ever DO that, of course...

4:12 AM  
Blogger kris said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

6:50 PM  

Post a Comment

<< Home