Wednesday, December 07, 2005

Life sucks and I rant


I couldn't sleep the other day. I was awake all night worrying about the state of the world. Shit like that happens when you get older. It starts with worrying about shit, followed by impotence, prostrate problems, syphillis, and finally death. Im growing old.
One of the nurses at work commented on my sleepy eyes. I told her about it. Now nurses come in two kinds. Nurses with psychotherapeutic pretensions, and psychotherapists with nursing pretensions. Both are bad. She looked at me for a second and ranted: "Islam? Jihad? Terrorism? Bush? America? Dolphins? Whales?"
The greatness of this psychotherapeutically inclined nurse shows through in her immediately hitting the spot. Yes I worry about islam. Yes I worry about Arab imperialism. (Actually Im not really worried about islam. It's a harmless joke. Wahabism is the poison Im worried about.)

Yes I worry! I worry about Europeans worrying about America and Bush fucking up the world. I worry about those same Europeans not worrying about Amsterdam being a predominantly islamic city by 2020. Europeans scare the crap out of me. I worry about my grandkids living in a reservation.

I've got lots of shit to worry about. During the nightshift one of the nurses, a pretty little thing with a nice ass, a tooth piercing, (yes people, a tooth piercing), and neither psychotherapeutic nor nursing pretensions. (fuck, she'll be reading this), took some pictures of me. No problem! Everyday I get nekkid in front of the mirror and dance like an idiot. (You'd probably do that if you were as sexy as me.) I feel fine being me. However on those pictures my head looked like a fucking world war I zeppelin. My head looked as if gnomes had been pumping air into it at night. Damn!
I knew I gained weight the last two years. But why does everything have to go straight to my head? I mean.... I still got a tight ass and a belly of a 14 year old.
And then some bitch comes along and tells me I dont need to diet.... just have lots of sex. eh............ DUH! It's not for a lack of trying (bitch).

More shit to worry about: Mickey keeps puking. It's not the smell. Cat puke has a fresh acidic smell to it. It's more that my expensive blue carpet now looks like a cheap blue carpet with random brown spots on it.

Even more shit to worry about: Sassy wont come online anymore. Her hubby left her. (Good for her! He was an asshole anyway.) Krissy wont get onlin anymore. Her hubby ......... well.......... let's just say she's not allowed online anymore.

New years resolution: Get involved with single women. Single women. SINGLE WOMEN YOU FUCK!

10 Comments:

Anonymous Laila said...

THANKS FOR BEING BACK, BULB!!!!

I didn't know that about Sassy... I am surprised and happy for her!!!!

You look tired in that photo and yet very sexy Bulb. Getting old is not that bad. It makes us more tired but it can not be this sad. I worry about the world that surrounds me however when I blog, it is still all about my navel.

I'll be thirty in January... and being honest with you, I can't wait to see that happening! I hope I'll become and look more mature so that my students will respect me better! I hope I'll get to know more about the things I teach. I wish to write more eloquently.

I'll be older so I have to be more competent, more responsible, understanding, and even more feared by the assholes. Hopefully I'll be wiser and stronger...

JUST HOPE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

6:56 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I talked to sassy the other day. I told her what she had to look forward to while going through what she's going through.
Hey I'm single. You don't ever try to pick up on me. Remember I just want meaningless sex anyway. Just kidding.
Take your cat to the vet. Poor kitty.
T

8:41 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Nice blog mate!
keep up the good stuff..

xx from Australia

10:43 PM  
Blogger fineartist said...

You don't have a fat head, relax. You're very handsome in a bald by choice way.

Sounds like Micky has hairballs, most cats do.

And you forgot senility and incontinence…

8:45 PM  
Blogger Rain said...

Hi there, just visiting your blog, since I heard a buzz about you being back.

3:04 AM  
Blogger Jess said...

*pouts* Here I missed you so and you can't even mention me..Why doesn't the world revolve around me? Oh yeah, cause it has better things to do..heh...Missed ya babe!

4:59 AM  
Blogger prairie biker said...

Nietzsche wrote you all off 130 years ago. Think about that.

1:15 AM  
Blogger kris said...

as the "bitch" who suggested sex... i never said you had to be with someone. hee...anyways like i said before your head is just fine. and you really should come visit the usa, there are lots of permiscuos women who would go wild over a good looking guy with an accent. and the best thing...you get to go back when holidays over. cause, like you prolly know by now..american chicks are spoiled rotten lil psychos. ok, now i gotta cover my ass...NOT all american chicks are the above. there now i wont get cussed out.

12:10 AM  
Blogger Sassy said...

You are like the sexiest man on earth, Bulb! We seem to bypass each other online. Im gonna try and be on more...I miss you so much! Stop thinking so much, yet that is what I love about you. You actually think with your heart. You have a penis and you can still think! You sooo deserve an award for that. =P Miss ya!

7:41 AM  
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10:56 AM  

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