Saturday, March 26, 2005

Rabbit

Rabbit: "


Take the What
animal best portrays your sexual appetite??
Quiz

"

Friday, March 25, 2005


Live like me.

Thursday, March 24, 2005

My Friend Geneva II

Yesterday I couldn't finish my post. Not so much from a lack of time. It was more an overkill of stupidity. A person can only take so much a day. But have no fear...... here's the rest.

geneva_steenhuis91 (20:41:42): did I writ good in there just know what I wort
geneva_steenhuis91 (20:43:07): are you reading what I wort how long are you going to be on line if I can ask
geneva_steenhuis91 (20:43:23): I have to do some house work geneva_steenhuis91 (20:43:30): and landery always fun
cojones2006 (20:43:49): nonononono wait....... gotta update my blog........ geneva_steenhuis91 (20:44:15): okay I will weit
geneva_steenhuis91 (20:44:20): no worrys
cojones2006 (20:44:37): ok......... visit the following link to my webpage:
cojones2006 (20:44:54): http://bulbousgrowth.blogspot.com/

By now I had the whole part I thing online and was ready for some kind of confrontation. However. The sheer stupidity of most people always continues to surprise me. Read on!

geneva_steenhuis91 (20:45:09): you wont me to look at it
cojones2006 (20:45:51): yes yes do
geneva_steenhuis91 (20:47:14): give that to me agian
geneva_steenhuis91 (20:47:30): something happend with my computere
geneva_steenhuis91 (20:47:31): sry
cojones2006 (20:47:38): just go to the page
cojones2006 (20:47:44): and see what pure evil is all about

Any normal person would by now feel that something was utterly wrong. Not my friend Geneva.

geneva_steenhuis91 (20:50:48): can you write it doewn
geneva_steenhuis91 (20:50:50): down
cojones2006 (20:51:02): http://bulbousgrowth.blogspot.com/
geneva_steenhuis91 (20:52:13): thanks
cojones2006 (20:52:33): you are welcome..... see Im a nice guy
geneva_steenhuis91 (20:52:55): brb
geneva_steenhuis91 (20:55:18): okay
geneva_steenhuis91 (20:55:36): thanks
geneva_steenhuis91 (20:55:53): what do i say
geneva_steenhuis91 (20:57:40): what do I say know
cojones2006 (20:57:57): what do you mean?
geneva_steenhuis91 (20:59:56): what do I say to coyote

Try, just try, using all your emphatic skills to feel the utter, and I do mean the UTTER astonishment at this display of cluelessness. Did she read the blog? Maybe she did, maybe she didn't. In both cases. There must be some kind of award for these kinds of persons like the Miss Clueless crown, or the Nobel Stupidity Prize.

geneva_steenhuis91 (21:00:06): and thanks for the site you give
geneva_steenhuis91 (21:00:06): me
cojones2006 (21:00:53): well...... tell him: "Didn't you read the blog bulb sent you? Are you stupid? Cant you read? Dont you understand anything?"
cojones2006 (21:00:58): Just copy and paste it
geneva_steenhuis91 (21:03:01): that was the first time I copyed something and pasted

I believe you there geneva. Now at this point several people in the room, having read my blog, are starting to scratch various body parts, in utter disbelieve.

cojones2006 (21:03:36): Good for you
geneva_steenhuis91 (21:03:55): doing good yhea you are a nice person we cool know I hope
geneva_steenhuis91 (21:04:00): we can talk when you are on
cojones2006 (21:04:12): yeah
cojones2006 (21:04:17): I'll help...... dont worry
cojones2006 (21:04:24): I think coyote is starting to like you

Yeah most people take an instant like to a person that insults them without reason.

geneva_steenhuis91 (21:04:29): thanks
geneva_steenhuis91 (21:04:42): give me one more thing
cojones2006 (21:05:22): okay......... tell him: "coyote...... you are not even half the man the Bulb is." dont ask....... coyote knows what you mean

Now here my narcissism is starting to get deeply wounded. Everybody knows whom the bulb is!! I mean come on...... the Bulb..... Cojones...... People fear and despise me!

geneva_steenhuis91 (21:07:43): do I cute and paste all of this
geneva_steenhuis91 (21:07:48): what you just wort
cojones2006 (21:07:49): sure
cojones2006 (21:07:52): cut and paste
geneva_steenhuis91 (21:08:32): what do I say so sassy to like me
cojones2006 (21:08:48): leave that to me
cojones2006 (21:08:50): 1 sec
geneva_steenhuis91 (21:08:59): thanks
geneva_steenhuis91 (21:10:51): can I say that bulb is a better men thet you will ever be
coyotegeneva_steenhuis91 (21:11:03): is that good or bad to say

aaaaaargh think woman think!!!!!!!! How the hell does someone not know the difference between Good or Bad. Want me to write you some kind of book? Some new-age Koran or Old Testament for people so forlorn they have lost their connection to themselves?

cojones2006 (21:11:08): no its great
cojones2006 (21:11:18): tell him the bulb is about 6 inches more man than he is
geneva_steenhuis91 (21:13:43): what is that good

That would probably make coyotes thingy -5 inches...... but I'm digressing.

geneva_steenhuis91 (21:13:51): still doing okay better then I was befor
geneva_steenhuis91 (21:14:01): thank you so much for you help really thanks
cojones2006 (21:14:10): yeah........ hey Im here to help.
cojones2006 (21:14:20): hey gotta update my blog...... be sure to read it
geneva_steenhuis91 (21:14:34): hey he does not like nice ppl I gusse coyote

I think he does. But he seems to have this thing for stupid people.

geneva_steenhuis91 (21:14:41): of crouse I will read it
geneva_steenhuis91 (21:14:50): how do you get one of those any hoe
geneva_steenhuis91 (21:14:51): how
cojones2006 (21:15:02): go to http://www.blogspot.com/
cojones2006 (21:15:31): sassy told me that coyote pmd her and she pmd you and you wont answer
geneva_steenhuis91 (21:15:43): sassy tryed to write me
geneva_steenhuis91 (21:15:45): omg
geneva_steenhuis91 (21:15:56): I didnt know tell her to write me again
geneva_steenhuis91 (21:18:51): does she wont to talk to me I will love to talk to her
cojones2006 (21:19:03): I have to ask
geneva_steenhuis91 (21:19:13): If I know it was her I would have said something what is her sercen namec
ojones2006 (21:19:27): beautyinsadness
cojones2006 (21:19:34): sassy
geneva_steenhuis91 (21:19:49): okay know that I know that I will talk to her if she pmd me again

Goddammit woman! For all you know this Sassy might be a psychopathic Lust-Blogger. What's with the wannabe-with-the-popular crowd attitude?? Get a fucking life.

geneva_steenhuis91 (21:20:03): what should I say more about coyote
cojones2006 (21:20:26): nothing....... let it simmer a bit...... hey I'll be backc
ojones2006 (21:20:29): see yah
geneva_steenhuis91 (21:23:32): ttly

And she left! Taking a suitcase full of freeze-dried stupid with her. Now just when you expect you have touched the limits of the infinite...... she comes back.
The next day I entered the room and there she was happily insulting people and wandering why nobody liked her.
Coyote not being around, she had pointed her poisonous arrows at Jinxy. (For those not in the know, Jinxy is the lovechild of Britney Spears on acid and a wet farth after a night out with the boys. Believe me. You dont wanna get on the bad side of the Jinx.
As soon as I enter the room, she messages me:

geneva_steenhuis91 (20:41:39): Do you know hoor (one of Jinxy's nicknames)
cojones2006 (20:41:45): yep
cojones2006 (20:41:56): dont even start with her........ she hates everybody
geneva_steenhuis91 (20:46:00): who is she is the pic in her profile really her


Jinxy's Picture

cojones2006 (20:46:10): yep thats her.
cojones2006 (20:46:14): Nasty isn't it?
geneva_steenhuis91 (20:46:27): does she have retaden or what ever it is
geneva_steenhuis91 (20:46:32): is she slow
cojones2006 (20:46:36): noooooo just very ugly
geneva_steenhuis91 (20:46:38): that is what I mean
geneva_steenhuis91 (20:46:42): oh got it
geneva_steenhuis91 (20:46:46): thank you
geneva_steenhuis91 (20:47:06): tell her that she needs to leave me alone (Well then I guess you shouldn't have insulted her in the first place!)
cojones2006 (20:47:28): hell no........... I dont want to getinto a fight with her...... she's mean
geneva_steenhuis91 (20:49:04): will she got me going
cojones2006 (20:49:07): wow........ you're catching on
geneva_steenhuis91 (20:49:08): that is for sure
geneva_steenhuis91 (20:49:19): yhea thanks you helped me out alot
geneva_steenhuis91 (20:58:37): hey I will talk to you later bye
geneva_steenhuis91 (20:58:44): take care if you are not on when I come back
geneva_steenhuis91 (20:58:49): laters
cojones2006 (20:58:49): bye bye

Now THAT IS IT. NO MORE!! I CANNOT TAKE IT! I suddenly understand why US postal workers and high school students run into crowded buildings butt-Nekkid and shoot up everybody they see. I just cant take it anymore! God You fucked up when you created the world.
Im sure I havent seen the last of geneva, but for me....... NO MORE NO FUCKING MORE!!!!!!!

Wednesday, March 23, 2005

My Friend Geneva

Okay sometimes its just tooooooo easy. This chick comes in the room, (my regular room, actors and actresses #1 on yahoo) I make fun of her, but she keeps coming back, (they always do), so I tell her to shut the fuck up. She asks why. I tell her she pisses me off, and ask whom else is pissed off by her. Of course everybody in the room is.
Then she sends me this private message:

geneva_steenhuis91: Why do I piss you off? and I am sorry that I do.
cojones2006: You just do
cojones2006: I guess you are the kind of person that pisses people off
geneva_steenhuis91: what am I saying is there anything I could do to make you not mad at me I would like to be you all friends becouse you all seem cool please
cojones2006: I need to think this over........ cause you have a serious problem here.
geneva_steenhuis91: is it something I am saying
geneva_steenhuis91: what is the pron please tell me
geneva_steenhuis91: I am sorry for getting you all upset but I don't understand what I did I am a nice person really turly sorry I didnt meen to hurt you if I did
geneva_steenhuis91: please belive me when I say sry
cojones2006: well......... I discussed it with sassy and she said this:

copying and pasting:
cojones2006: beautyinsadness : :-(
beautyinsadness : she's such a fuckin dork

cojones2006: I dont really agree to that
cojones2006: do you have the same problem in real life?
cojones2006: I mean...... people getting pissed off just for nothing when they meet you?
geneva_steenhuis91: what does beatyinsadness mean
geneva_steenhuis91: no I don't have that prob in life
geneva_steenhuis91: and I like sassy
geneva_steenhuis91: I think she is really cool
cojones2006: nothing........ she's beautiful and sad........ and she really doesn't like you much
geneva_steenhuis91: when ppl meet me in real life they like me
geneva_steenhuis91: is that why you don
geneva_steenhuis91: like me
geneva_steenhuis91: I know you are not like her that is why I am talking to you
cojones2006: well.......... I will try to help you....... but I really dont know what it is..... that pisses people off as soon as you say something
cojones2006: HHave you tried being a little more assertive online?
geneva_steenhuis91: how do I do that
geneva_steenhuis91: I am just trying to fite in
geneva_steenhuis91: with you all
geneva_steenhuis91: usly I dont even swear I am one of those good girls that dont get in trouble
cojones2006: well........ for instance take coyote......... he likes to fight....... so just tell him....... "coyote....... you are a fag aren't you?"
cojones2006: see he likes that.
geneva_steenhuis91: so maybe ppl see that
cojones2006: I think you are trying too hard to be nice
geneva_steenhuis91: will I am afriad if I am mean ppl still will not like me
geneva_steenhuis91: but yhea I will try that
geneva_steenhuis91: thanks your the best
cojones2006: ok
geneva_steenhuis91: weit befor I say that to coyte what does he need to say for me to say that to him
cojones2006: nothing
cojones2006: if he asks you why...... just tell him...... its a gut feeling......
cojones2006: the way he talks
geneva_steenhuis91: okay thanks so much
geneva_steenhuis91: I hope you still dont hate me
geneva_steenhuis91: can I say it like this coyote you like to fight
geneva_steenhuis91: your a fag arent you
cojones2006: naaaaaaah.............
geneva_steenhuis91: can I say it like that to
cojones2006: that's too sweet
cojones2006: say: "coyote....... you're a fag aren't you? I mean dont be ashamed..... we all have something different"
cojones2006: see....... he will like you....... and start a fight....... but you fight well...... and he likes you more........ its simple
geneva_steenhuis91: okay I will try tell me how I do
cojones2006: ok

Now against all odds, the bitch actually tells coyote he's a fag. Knowing coyote.... my long time online buddy..... he's...... mmmm how do you say this. Did you see fight club? Did you see seven years in Tibet? Well..... add both movies stir, mix some spanish peppers, a healthy dose of schizophrenia and garlic in and you got coyote.
Only problem this evening coyote seemed to be in his eight year in Tibet. Goddamn I hate those liberal pascifists.


geneva_steenhuis91: did I do it wrong
cojones2006: NONONONONON
cojones2006: great
cojones2006: now....... entice him a bit
geneva_steenhuis91: thanks for your help
geneva_steenhuis91: okay
cojones2006: tell him: "aren't you man enough for a real woman? or is it just that yor mother was an overpowering bitch?"
cojones2006: you doing great
geneva_steenhuis91: it is not working
cojones2006: see......... my best friends.......... always started in bar fights
cojones2006: yes it will........ you just need to scratch a little more
cojones2006: try coming up with something yourself...... something insulting his penis...... that always does the trick
geneva_steenhuis91: help me out alittle with that
cojones2006: ok
geneva_steenhuis91: I think I could say that he is to in to his penis that is why a women does it like him
geneva_steenhuis91: I doun
cojones2006: say: "Cojones........ your misoginy is appaling....... now get your dictionary..... and dont even start comparing the number of pages to the mm's of your dick ....... cause you will just get depressed."
geneva_steenhuis91: lol
geneva_steenhuis91: that is a good one
geneva_steenhuis91: say it to you
cojones2006: you could....... but Im not coyote
geneva_steenhuis91: oh
geneva_steenhuis91: I will say it to coyote
geneva_steenhuis91: thanks I never really done this befor
geneva_steenhuis91: what is he saying
cojones2006: Next thing........ speed............ if you gonna fight........ be quick....... strinke.....strike..... strike...... not strike..... wait..... have a beer.... wait some more...... strike.......
geneva_steenhuis91: say that to him
cojones2006: okokokok wait
cojones2006: ok .......... wait ......... all will become clear........ gimme a second

This bitch actually wrote coyote to get himself a dictionary bigger than his penis. And WTF? Coyote seems to be in his ninth year in Tibet. Meanwhile on the homefront...... I'm trying to get this shit on my blog as soon as possible. I mean....... man..... is this bitch stupid? or what? By now Im wandering what else she'd do if I told her so. If I were to tell her to play with the elephant until it sneezed, she'd probably do it. Hell this is just too much for one night..... I will finish tomorrow.

-------> to be continued <-------

Im lightly Nerdy

Wx Plotter Fun Tests - Nerd Quiz: "
I am nerdier than 46% of all people. Are you nerdier? Click here to find out!
"

Tuesday, March 22, 2005

Plez sent Pik

I guess a better title for this entry would be: "Plez snt pik we starvin but no speak Engrish."

This evening my friend Krissy send me the following message:
flwrsnbutterflies1978 (20:14:32): im bitchy today...ok this idiot has sent me dozens of ims
flwrsnbutterflies1978 (20:14:49): man_lemooo: flwrsnbutterflies1978: WHAT?! man_lemooo: how are you man_lemooo: you here flwrsnbutterflies1978: no im not man_lemooo: ok man_lemooo: im sory man_lemooo: bay flwrsnbutterflies1978: should be man_lemooo: whts yor nem

Now a message like this from one of my friends...... Ah life can be sweet. A thrill of energy revived my tired soul...... systems long forgotten surged into action. The hunt is about to begin.


misty_morning2006 (20:15:36): Hi
man_lemooo (20:15:43): hi
man_lemooo (20:15:54): how are you
misty_morning2006 (20:16:03): not so good
misty_morning2006 (20:16:04): you?
man_lemooo (20:17:34): hello
man_lemooo (20:17:36): asl plz
misty_morning2006 (20:17:47): 15 f cali you?
man_lemooo (20:18:01): asl you pklz
man_lemooo (20:18:04): asl you plz
misty_morning2006 (20:18:14): ehm...... I just told you
man_lemooo (20:18:24): ok
misty_morning2006 (20:18:30): Your grasp of the Enlish language is a bit subpar isn't it?
man_lemooo (20:18:32): yor nam
misty_morning2006 (20:18:48): Misty
misty_morning2006 (20:19:05): Are you going to ask me a shitload of questions and not answer mine?
man_lemooo (20:19:05): you /m
man_lemooo (20:19:34): from were misty
misty_morning2006 (20:20:30): You ask my asl...... but fail to comprehend when I give it to you...... I already told you dude.
misty_morning2006 (20:22:12): I suppose you want to cyber now?
man_lemooo (20:22:27): yas
misty_morning2006 (20:22:38): yas?
misty_morning2006 (20:23:12): Ok I take my aardvark and prepare it so you can copulate it.
misty_morning2006 (20:23:15): okay?
man_lemooo (20:25:35): you want whte
misty_morning2006 (20:26:14): You do know how to copulate an aardvark dont you?
man_lemooo (20:26:49): you male /famle
misty_morning2006 (20:27:06): famle
man_lemooo (20:28:20): from were
misty_morning2006 (20:28:25): cali like I said
misty_morning2006 (20:28:38): Im starting to believe you have a deficit in the upper chambers dont you?
man_lemooo (20:29:05): you from were
misty_morning2006 (20:29:14): cali
misty_morning2006 (20:29:17): CALI
misty_morning2006 (20:29:20): FUCKING CALI
misty_morning2006 (20:29:26): you hearing impaired?
man_lemooo (20:29:51): how old are you
misty_morning2006 (20:30:34): 15 I told ya
man_lemooo (20:30:47): ok
man_lemooo (20:30:49): good
man_lemooo (20:30:57): you want me
man_lemooo (20:31:10): send me photo you
misty_morning2006 (20:31:26): Yesssssssss I want to stuff a meatcarver up your sphincter
man_lemooo (20:31:26): now
misty_morning2006 (20:31:29): is that okay?
man_lemooo (20:31:45): good
man_lemooo (20:31:52): send now
misty_morning2006 (20:32:09): First....... can I slice your abdomen so that your intestines come out when we have sex?
misty_morning2006 (20:32:21): ??
man_lemooo (20:32:38): you love sex
misty_morning2006 (20:33:40): yes and I love electrocuting your miniscule dick
misty_morning2006 (20:33:43): Would you like that?
man_lemooo (20:34:26): plz send me photo you plz send now
man_lemooo (20:35:12): man_lemooo@yahoo.com
misty_morning2006 (20:35:19): why the rush....... Im fantasising stuffing your mouth full of faeces....... I bet you'd like that wouldn't you?
man_lemooo (20:36:58): you want me
man_lemooo (20:37:21): send me photo you now
misty_morning2006 (20:37:47): yes......... I would even use my anal disruptor on you so you never get to take another crap without excrutiating sensations
misty_morning2006 (20:38:51): You want me?
man_lemooo (20:39:05): yas
misty_morning2006 (20:39:21): You want to copulate an pitbull terrier???
man_lemooo (20:39:23): plz send me photo you plz
man_lemooo (20:40:00): yas want copulate
man_lemooo (20:40:20): you love copulate
misty_morning2006 (20:40:21): YES!! My Pitbull is gonna looooove you
man_lemooo (20:40:40): ok
man_lemooo (20:40:45): in love you
man_lemooo (20:40:58): im want look you
man_lemooo (20:41:20): plz send me photo
misty_morning2006 (20:41:21): will you try to give gratification to my pittbull?
misty_morning2006 (20:42:10): I think you will like my picture
man_lemooo (20:43:02): masty you love me
misty_morning2006 (20:43:19): My Pittbull will!
man_lemooo (20:44:01): plz send me photo now
misty_morning2006 (20:44:16): yes yes wait
misty_morning2006 (20:44:23): what kind you like?
man_lemooo (20:44:25): good
misty_morning2006 (20:45:31): yes yes
misty_morning2006 (20:45:57): You want a picture of my uterus inside out? or a regular one?
man_lemooo (20:46:35): im want you
man_lemooo (20:46:45): plz send me plz
misty_morning2006 (20:47:14): Me you mean you like ME to suffocate you with the bladder of a giraffe?
man_lemooo (20:47:43): plaz plz plz plz plz plz
man_lemooo (20:47:59): you love
misty_morning2006 (20:48:41): Okay but first tell me is it true you have to use a pincet while pleasuring yourself?
man_lemooo (20:49:39): im man love romance want you wife me
misty_morning2006 (20:50:22): yes yes
misty_morning2006 (20:50:25): Im sure you do
misty_morning2006 (20:50:45): You would probably make me wanna have convulsions just by looking at you
misty_morning2006 (20:51:04): Still want that pic?
man_lemooo (20:51:12): you no want send
misty_morning2006 (20:51:19): sure I send you
misty_morning2006 (20:51:22): gimme a minute
man_lemooo (20:51:24): im divoreced
man_lemooo (20:52:01): hi
man_lemooo (20:53:14): you no send now im goo
man_lemooo (20:53:52):
misty_morning2006 (20:59:30): hey motherfucker....... read http://bulbousgrowth.blogspot.com/ you'll be the next entry

Hard Times

Hard times in Cyberland! I took a few days vacation from the internet, only to find on returning that all the pervs had quietly removed their pictures and none of them had had the guts to reply to my emails.
Luckily, being the sneaky bastard that I am, I made copies. But this means I actually have to find a way to put those pictures up here. (As if my life wasn't complicated enough as it is.)

Something strange is happening to me. I do not enjoy cybering pervs anymore! My in-built "We got a bogey, zooming in for the kill." response seems to have been replaced by a "Oh God. Not another one of those Arab camel fuckers." response. And it just gets too easy. Complicating this serious psychiatric disturbance is the absence of my cyber-buddy Teresa (a.k.a. Queen of cyber). And HELL YES! I miss her. Teresa is the only young attractive female on the net who gets away with posing as a 43 year old "homosexual gay man" (dont ask) who lives with his mother. Her succes rate in finding and cybering those poor Indian and Arab pervs is only equalled by my own.

My other cyber-buddy Sassy and me, managed to make one guy completely crazy over a period of a couple of days. I cant blame him. What lonely divorced all-American hunter-fisher guy, wouldn't be interested in a threesome with two underaged girls. One of whom is convinced her clitoris is somewhere up her ass.
But then something funny started happening. We actually started liking the guy and felt sorry for him. I mean FOR CHRIST SAKE, this guy actually confessed that he was affraid his penis was too small. Now..... who wouldn't love a guy like that?

In closing no cybering today....... I will however paste a nice message I got from Krissy (my future ex-wife in another space-time continuum)

flwrsnbutterflies1978 (0:27:44): hey...miss you get your ass on soon...anyways i wrote a poem for you to post in your blog if you want...titled: Kill the cheerleaders....
1! 2! 3! 4! We are all attention whores!
5! 6! 7! 8! We think were all so great!
Fake smiles and long blonde hair, fannies sticking in the air...
They are dumb and never study, but thats ok cause theyre all buddies...
Pom poms flying everywhere, wishing them dead with a glare...
People looking at their butts, they are just a bunch of sluts!